Monday, 19 August 2013
7 Degrees of Lesbian
There are so many “subcultures” if you will in the lesbian universe, and lately it’s started to bother me. Personally I only take offence when offence is intended, one of my best friends calls me a “dyke” all the time but her tone and demeanour clearly portray affection, and I call her worse in return – isn’t friendship grand! Labels never bothered me; I fit so many it just proves how silly they really are. Lesbian, Dyke, Femme, Lipstick, Goth, Punk, Yummy Mummy, Rocker, Pacifist, Activist, Feminist, Hippy and apparently I “look” vegetarian, I’m not sure how I manage that... but there you have it. I’m not by the way, I tried to be but I lost a scary amount of weight and couldn’t maintain it. I just select my animal products very, very carefully. And now back to my original point...
If you Google “types of lesbians” you get over 60 million results!
I don’t know how it is for gay men... Because, well, I’m not one. But, in the lesbian world other lesbians seem to feel the need to lump everyone into vast range of categories, for lack of a better term. And even though I genuinely don’t mind the labels I acquired alone with my orientation, I wonder what good it can do for a minority to separate itself like that. So below I’ve listed the seven most common, at least that I’ve heard! Please feel free to add your own regional stereotypes in the comments below!
Often called “Manish” or “boyish” because of how they dress, both of those descriptions are highly offensive in my opinion. Butch or not they are women... Women who love women. Also, just because a lesbian has short hair doesn’t make her Butch. It’s commonly assumed that they date Femme or Lipstick girls and take on the traditional male roles in a relationship. NEWS FALSH:
This just isn’t true! Who said that Butch girls can’t be the one to stay home and raise babies if that’s what they wanna do? Clothes don’t make or unmake a woman! Own it, girls!
Probably the least offense and one I most commonly hear. Girly, loves all things pink and sparkly. Wears dresses and carry handbags to keep all of our girly essentials in. Often met with comments like “You don’t look like a lesbian” not only from straight men and women, but even in a gay bar with your arms around another girl. What are lesbians supposed to look like? Are there some rules that femme girls must follow. “Blue jeans Femme” is another term for the girls that are all things femme on nights out and at parties/occasions or because they want to feel good; but are casual the rest of the time, honestly though I think most of us are both depending on the day!
Sexual orientation is not a fashion statement, its self awareness and pride and loving whoever is lucky enough to come along and win your glittery, glossed up, high heeled heart! Flaunt it, ladies!
A young, fresh out of the closet girls trying to find their niche, typically shy and easily embarrassed when flirted with. Fashion wise, they are normally preppy or hipster pretty much on trend for student fashion. Converse and coloured jeans being the most common that I’ve seen, and hairstyles somewhere in the middle of “boy short” and shoulder length. To all you Baby Dykes out there searching for their niche; STOP you’ve finally (in some cases) come to terms with your sexuality, and trust my you’ll be labelled and relabelled soon enough by other lesbians and the rest or the world. Don’t “fit in”
L.E.A.D - Love Explore Aspire Discover
I know what you’re thinking; didn’t you do this one already? Well not exactly, some people lump Lipstick lesbians and Femmes into the same category. This is a touchy subject for me because it recently come to my attention that I hold the same stereotypical view of Lipstick lesbians, and maybe I get a little bit touchy when mistaken for one... maybe! Lipstick lesbian’s are, presumably, Femme times ten, with good, often high powered jobs, always look amazing and are a little bit posh or snobby. And again... not true at all, and even I’ve fallen prey to narrow-minded thinking. So, I apologise deeply and say to you all; Work it, baby!!
Dyke’s are pretty hard to define, honestly I think that any lesbian that isn’t overtly Butch or Femme get thrown in there just because they don’t fit any of the rest decisively enough. If I was to categorise her I suppose my fiancée would fit in here too, and I think creating a new stereotype just for her would be discriminatory... personally I think “perfect” describes her to a tee. Generally girls classed as Dyke aren’t really into dresses and make-up but have their moments for special occasions. Wearing men’s tee shirts and hoodies is common, but normally they’ll stick to women’s jeans, the new trend of “boyfriend” style jeans a growing favourite. Basically, they are a little bit of both ends of the spectrum. And why not? Hell yeah, ladies. Fuck with the system!
Gold Star’s are girls that have only had sexually encounters with other girls, and they span the entire spectrum of “sub-categories”
Not to be mistaken for transgender, there are many different types of understanding of this term. But I personally think it’s quite simple, and please correct me if I’m wrong or if your interpretation is different. I think it’s girl’s who are born female and have no desire to either become male or define themselves as female, and they like GIRLS! (This goes the same for Gender Queer gay guys too) To some it may seem like a pointless title but when we live in a world with REAL gender equality there’ll be no need for it! Typically I suppose these girls dress in gender neutral clothing and they date girls... there’s not much more I can say about it really, due to unfamiliarity and the fact that at the end of the day they’re just people like you and me!
So there you have it, I hope I didn’t leave anyone out, because who’d wanna miss out the chance to stereotyped and summed up in short paragraphs. I’d just like to point out that I don’t mean any offense to anyone, I’m gay, I know what it’s like. My only intention here was to point out the flaws in the systems lesbians on mass impose on themselves and divulge a few of my own transgressions of falling into the same trap. Let’s just love each other, not label each other.